Childcare work done within extended middle-class households by grandparents is a primary engagement of individuals over sixty years of age in South Asian societies. This paper focuses on the everyday experiences of caregiving of grandmothers in urban India. By illuminating the contemporary conflicts these women face in their daily caregiving work, the paper argues that within middle-class households, for grandmothers; the centrality of care work as the primary task is declining. This creates conflicts because grandmothers’ contributions to childcare work often provide significant support to other household members for pursuing professional goals and effectively carrying out parental responsibilities. The paper describes points of disjuncture between grandmothers and various members of the household who are pushing for the maintenance of the traditional modes of grandmothering.
Using an interpretivist lens to enquire into narratives of grandmothers’ childcare work, it contextualizes and explains internal (affective, cognitive and normative) and external (physical, material, social) conflicts faced by elderly women once a grandchild is added to their household. The paper explores common frictions between grandmothers and various household members around these four themes: (i) Changing gender roles in the household by considering conflicts between mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law (ii) Contemporary interpretations of social mores like maintaining friendships with other elderly people, attending kitty-parties and, investing informally in ‘committees’ (iii) Alterations in religious practices – belonging to organized religious groups, taking part in administrative work, lobbying for donations (iv) Expanding mobility and connectivity – increased mobility through public and private transport, increased exposure through social media, travelling for religious/leisure purposes. Conflicts felt on many fronts point to the changing nature of grandmotherhood in this part of the global south.
